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What Spider-man 4 should and shouldn’t be August 17, 2007

Posted by scartissuemark in Movie Reviews, Screenplay's, Stories, Scripts, Treatments....
2 comments

Like many fans i enjoyed Spider-Man 3 at the time of first seeing it, but then after a few weeks you look back and see all the things that could’ve made it better. So here is my thoughts on what went wrong the what the future sequels should have to make them fresh and exciting.

I think that in Spider-man 4 there should be very limited time of mary jane in the story. In spider-man 1 we saw peter pining after MJ and befriending her, in spider-man 2 they grew apart while falling in love, and in spider-man 3 they went from being happy to miserable.

For the films; the MJ and peter parker story has run it’s course, we don’t need to see anymore as we’ve had three films worth so far. The format has become stale, it’s like those great TV shows that start off with a great first season of characters dating on and off but then in the second and third seasons new characters are introduced, dated and then gone and forgotten by the end of the season while the orginal characters get back to their on-again-off-again relationships that by now have lost their appeal.

I understand that Peter isn’t the most happiest of superheroes, but he need to lighten up a little so the fans don’t feel so depressed and sorry for him.

So here is how i see Spider-man 4 being a fresh spidey story and major hit. The theme will be ‘THE HUNT’ (see below)
Mary jane and peter have broken up, it’s been a few months, they’ve eached moved on although they are still there for each other when needed, Peter is dating Betty Brant and is doing relatively well at the paper and at college. He and Dr connors have grown closer and frequently do experiments together as friends.
Now the meat of the story unfolds. Loose on the streets of New York is a maniacal serial killer who craves nothing but death and blood, he is of course Cletus Kassidy (Human Kassidy) he has claimed several victims thus far in a string of killing and attacks. One night he finds Mary Jane,  she becomes critically wounded (comatose, scarred, virtually dead) Peter parker finds out and all his feelings of anger come back, doubled this time by the fat that he wasn’t there to save like he did in every single film so far (this is important as she has gotten taken in every movie and recovered without a scratch) Peter finds out that it was Kassidy but knows that he, Peter, is no killer, so he decides that he needs  one thing to help in his quest for justice, he goes to Dr Connors lab and steals the mutated/offspringed symbiote of Venom that is Carnage, he bonds with Carnage and searches for Kassidy.

For the Majority of the film we see much more of Spider-man than peter parker as the movie is called Spider-man 4, not peter parker 4. This starts the theme of the hunt as spider-carnage hunts for Kassidy, as he does this he is attacked by another hunter, Kraven who comes to new york to kill the greatest game of all Spider-Man, So Kraven hunts Spidey, Spidey hunts Kassidy.

Spidey finds Kassidy and since he’s only human, spidey doesn’t get his ass handed to him or his costume ripped to shreds, he injures, and by that i mean when he hits Kassidy there is actual evidence of trauma unlike spidey drop kincking the powerless Doc Ock and not leaving so much as a red mark. During the attack the Carnage Symbiote senses the evil in Kassidy and betrays spidey by bonding with Kassidy making the evil Carnage character.

This is a great chance to do a symbiote story PROPERLY, i know Sam Raimi had no love for Venom, but i find Venom to be one of the most interesting and vile characters because he didn’t rob banks or want to do science projects or rule the world, he was a direct enemy of Spider-man who’s only goal was to kill spider-man, in the third film this whole lengthy pschycological pursuit of spider-man and beating him at evey corner was totally left out or squeezedd into five minutes at the end, What’s worse is that Venom teams up with sandman before he even take a shot at Spidey himself, The CGI work was amazing but simply not used enough, we only see his Venom face once for about thrity seconds the rest of the time he is whizzing by so fast you can’t even focus on him.

What i think failed in spidey 3 wasn’t that they included too much but they didn’t have enough balance to tell the full story, there was about 3/4 of the film with Peter and Mary jane moaning at each other or on the phone, 5 mins of Venom and about twenty minutes of sandman, this took away all the characterisation of the villains that make you value their place in the story.

The forth should be like Empires’, equal amounts of the segments of the story, the villian(s) (Darth Vader on the Star Destroyer), the hero (Luke on Dagobah) and other characters to show the impact of the story (Han and Leia)

I’m not sure how the rest of the story should go but i think the ending shouldn’t have a complete resolution like 2 and 3. In spider-man, Peter is left with more happening as he and harry talk bout his fathers death. In the second, MJ comes to peter and they are loved up and the end equalling a happy ending, in the third although Harry dies he becomes a good guy and so has a heroic end, a little sad, but venom is defeated and sandman leaves, so things look pretty resolved

In the end of the forth i think the carnage symbiote having been turned further evil by Cassidy should re-bond with Spider-man and we should see peter’s face underneath screaming a silent scream with tears running down his face as the symboite tortures his mind… fade to black with a to be continued line.

Important things that should and shouldn’t happen in the story:

  1. Spider-man is not unmasked, so far Green Goblin knew who he was as did Harry, Mary Jane, Doc Ock, Sandman, Venom and a  whole bunch of people on the train, i mean it’s a wonder the whole of New York doesn’t know.
  2. Flat un-interesting continuation of the Peter/MJ story thats been done to death.
  3. More time for the villains to shine.
  4. More Spidey than parker, we’ve got three films full of parker.
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Marvel Nightcrawler Movie (TRAILER) August 25, 2006

Posted by scartissuemark in Screenplay's, Stories, Scripts, Treatments....
25 comments

Nightcrawler

Written by Mark Hawkins.

EXTERIOR SKYLINE — NEW YORK CITY

From high in the sky the CAMERA views the vibrant, bustling island of Manhattan in the city known to it’s occupiers as “the big apple”: New York.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, SIDEWALK — NIGHT

As several citizens’ walk along this sidewalk, living out their normal everyday lives a narration begins.

Kurt Wagner Narration
For so long now, I have travelled… From my home in Germany…

A flashback sequence ensues after a dark shadowy mist of teleportation cloud fades …

INTERIOR GERMAN THREE-RING CIRCUS, CIRCUS-TOP — DAY

A blue-skinned, arrow spiked tailed mutant is presented in a large circus setting high above the ground as he swings as an acrobat on cables, poles and rings as the astonished crowds cheer.

Circus Narrator
(German subtitled narration) Quick as a cat, faster than the night, show your appreciation for the death defying… (yell)… Nightcrawler.

In a dark shadowy mist of Nightcrawler’s teleportation cloud the CAMERA returns to the citizens’ on the sidewalk from a different angle as the previous narration continues…

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, SIDEWALK — NIGHT

Kurt Wagner Narration
To London…

Another cloud of shadowy teleportation mist appears and disappears to reveal another flashback sequence…

EXTERIOR CITY OF LONDON, CLOCKFACE OF BIG BEN — NIGHT

With his arrow spiked tail swaying back and forth below him, the demonic-appearing mutant sits sadly on the large hand of Big Ben at 11:15 pm looking to the night sky.

Another cloud of dark shadowy teleportation mist carries the CAMERA back to the New York sidewalk, as the citizens continue their regular lives…

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, SIDEWALK — NIGHT

The continuing narration sounds as the citizens’ walk along the sidewalk.

Kurt Wagner Narration
To the great churches of Moscow…

INTERIOR MOSCOVITE CHURCH, ALTAR — NIGHT

In a large Victorian-style church the blue-skinned mutant kneels praying to his lord at the altar.

Kurt Wagner (Quiet Praying)
Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom…

Another shadowy teleportation mist guides the CAMERA back to New York…

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, SIDEWALK — NIGHT

The narration continues as the CAMERA views the citizens’ walking out their lives on the sidewalk.

The CAMERA views the bowed head of a man walking amongst these citizens’. Wearing a plain black cap covering his spiky blue hair and elf-like ears and long black coloured trench coat covering his other undergarments.

Kurt Wagner Narration
Never have I found peace, acceptance. Only anger, hate and fear.

A small girl walking alongside his father looks to her left and sees that the man next to her has only two fingers and one thumb, his hands are covered by black leather gloves with purple line designs keep his two fingered hands out of the obvious eye-line.

The small girl looks up to the man’s face. From a CAMERA view that is seen through the small girl’s line of sight, the man looks down to her face and removes his black sunglasses.
His yellow eyes glow with evilness and he widens his lips and smiles a friendly smile at the girl. After seeing the man’s bright evil eyes and sharp damaging fangs the girl recoils and hugs her dad’s leg tightly. The man’s smile turns to a frown and he returns his glasses and his head forward facing, a small tear drips down the side of his barely visible blue cheek.

Out of nowhere a scream is heard across the street, the same man, known in the circus as ‘Nightcrawler’ and by few as ‘Kurt Wagner’ turns his head in surprise and looks across the street.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, SIDEWALK AND ALLEYWAY — NIGHT

An attractive woman, on this other side of the street is being forcibly held by two men and dragged into an alleyway as onlookers ignore the situation.

Woman screaming
Aaaaaagh.

The two men throw the woman down on the pavement, one of the men approaches her from the side and the other blocks her escape to the street.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, SIDEWALK — NIGHT

Back in the other side of the street Nightcrawler acts.
He knocks off his hat and leaps ten feet up in the air to his left and grabs the vertical lamppost with his hands and feet.
The crowd he was amongst gasps in horror as Nightcrawler exposes himself as part of the ‘mutant problem’.
He spins around the pole so that his back is facing the distressed woman across the street.
From underneath the back of his cream coloured trench coat his blue arrow spiked tail emerges and swings up to the horizontal pole holding that holds light bulb, where it wraps around the pole securely.
Nightcrawler uses the strength from his tail and pulls himself up horizontally and over the horizontal pole, he twists his body so that he faces the sky horizontally, he then continues the movement and twists his body around to complete the 360º movement.
He lands horizontally with his feet balanced on the pole, releases his tail and turns around to face the other side of the street. Nightcrawler takes off his glasses and flings them away.
Nightcrawler then runs to the edge of the pole and leaps forward and up toward the alleyway, as he ascends above the middle of the street he raises his knees and disappears in his cloud of dark shadowed teleportation mist.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, ALLEYWAY — NIGHT

Across the street, in the alleyway the men prepare to attack the woman.
The CAMERA views the man guarding the street exit and around ten feet of space above him.

NightcrawlerNightcrawler’s dark shadowy teleportation mist appears above this man and Nightcrawler appears. He falls from the sky and lands atop the man’s shoulders with his feet and drives him down on his face behind him. With an upward slash of his arrow spiked tail Nightcrawler cuts a straight line out of the man’s face and forces him up and back onto his back.
On all fours, like a cat Nightcrawler gallops and leaps toward the second thug, his back is now facing the street exit. He jumps up, lifts his legs and with both his hands and feet he grabs onto the thug’s shoulders. He then continues holding on with his hands and he drops the leverage with his legs from the thug’s shoulders to his abdomen.
This change of leverage immediately helps Nightcrawler, he willingly falls back and rolls on his back with the thug being pulled with him and lifted onto his legs. Before he continues the roll over toss and tosses the thug Nightcrawler teleports away with the thug just before the thug flies across the alley.
From his dark shadowy teleportation mist Nightcrawler re-appears high up in the air, both he and the thug are vertically positioned, upside down and Nightcrawler’s back is facing the other direction (the street). With the thug still held by Nightcrawler’s hands behind the thug’s neck and his legs in the thug’s abdomen, Nightcrawler continues the roll over movement up in the air and he launches the thug with his legs. Nightcrawler continues spinning around and drops to the ground on his feet as the thug is pushed away behind him and falls vertically to horizontally and crashes into an alley dumpster.
The CAMERA views the first thug, who is now standing with a long straight-line trail of blood down his face. He is standing with his back to the street, holding a walther PPK pistol and pointing it at Nightcrawler.
The CAMERA views Nightcrawler as the thug opens fire. Nightcrawler gallops toward the thug as he jumps to his left and right to dodge the bullets. After dodging to his left and then right Nightcrawler launches his body and cartwheel jumps to his left, when he reaches an upside down position his dark shadowy teleportation mist surrounds him and he teleports away just as a bullet passes through the fading mist.
For a few brief seconds there is no activity, no Nightcrawler, only the gunman thug, scared to death of this blue demon.

Nightcrawler re-appears in the air and in a continuing a movement he flies to his right, his tail wraps around the last step of a fire-escape ladder and he pulls himself back in the direction he came from as a shot passes where he would have been if he had not pulled away.
Nightcrawler drops to the ground and leaps toward the gunman as the gunman blasts a shot. Nightcrawler is hit and thrown back by the shot; he lands on his side facing the distressed woman with his back to the gunman. As the gunman approaches Nightcrawler, still pointing his gun, Nightcrawler’s tail whooshes up and wraps around the wrist of the man’s gun hand. The tail pulls the man down, forward and a little away from Night crawler. The man hits the ground on his hands and knees and his PPK slides away. In one fast motion Nightcrawler rolls over his side to face the thug, he continues and lifts his body onto his hands, stands vertically on his hands, twists his body around and flips onto his feet to land with one leg positioned on either side of the thug’s right arm. Nightcrawler hops and twists his body; with his legs on either side of the thug’s right arm the twist snaps and breaks the thug’s arm.
Nightcrawler then places his feet under the thug’s shoulder and torso and he leaps up, pulling the thug up and back onto his feet.
As the thug staggers Nightcrawler bends over and his tail launches out and wraps the end around the thug’s neck. The tails lifts and throws the thug up into the air.
With his dark, shadowy teleportation mist Nightcrawler teleports away.
Nightcrawler immediately re-appears above his position and with the thug still remaining in the air, now in front of him, he launches out a two legged dropkick, kicks the thug back and into the same dumpster as he falls horizontally to vertically to land on his hands, knees and feet.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, ALLEYWAY — NIGHT

Still sitting on the rain-soaked blacktop; the distressed woman wipes the desiccated tears from her face as she stares with relief and awe at her mysterious saviour.
Across the alleyway Nightcrawler stands up with his face and head en-gulfed in shadow. The woman, now standing, approaches her rescuer.

Woman
Oh my god, oh thank you, thank…

As she approaches Nightcrawler with open arms, he backs away toward the street and his shadowed head and face become visible to the woman.
Upon seeing his demon like visage the woman freezes, her eyes widen, her breath quickens and she stares in disbelief and horror.
Nightcrawler sees her expression and recoils his head, he then looks up again, and with a sad expression on his face he looks into her shocked eyes.

Nightcrawler (quietly & sadly)
You’re velcome.

Nightcrawler fades away with his dark shadowy teleportation mist.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY ALLEYWAY, ROOFTOP — NIGHT

NightcrawlerNightcrawler’s dark shadowy teleportation mist appears on the edge of the rooftop of one of the alleyway buildings.
On all fours, heading right, Nightcrawler slowly and painfully gallops out from his teleportation mist and crawls along the edge of the rooftop.
Nightcrawler stops moving, laboriously balances himself on his arms and drops both of his legs down over the inner edge of the rooftop and lands on the rooftop surface, 2 feet below the position of his arms, both still on the heightened edge. He turns around so that his back is to the 2 ft high edge and he gently bends his knees to lower softly to a sitting position with his back resting against the 2 ft high rooftop edging.
He sits, blankly staring forward at the surface of the rooftop, deep in thought of self-pity.
Nightcrawler’s blue arrow spiked tail emerges from his right side, the tail manoeuvres so that becomes positioned in front of Nightcrawler, pointing away with the arrow spiked end bent 180º, pointing toward Nightcrawler. Nightcrawler lifts his head and rests it against the rooftop edging; gloomily looking to the skies.
As if preparing for a sudden movement the arrow spiked end of the tail moves away from Nightcrawler, then toward, then away again and finally it then rushes toward the left side of Nightcrawler and stabs into the rooftop edging, just by his side. The tail returns in front of Nightcrawler and with the arrow spiked end still facing Nightcrawler’s chest, the tail immediately stabs into the rooftop edging by Nightcrawler’s right side.
The tail then backs up away from the rooftop edging again and prepares once more for a stabbing motion.
The tail’s adjusts and the arrow spiked end aims to stab the centre of Nightcrawler’s chest.
Nightcrawler’s tail pulls back and…stops, just short of stabbing himself when a police siren sounds from the street by the building.
With his dark, shadowy teleportation mist Nightcrawler teleports away and re-materialises in a crouching position on the 2 ft high rooftop edge to the right of his former position. From an over the shoulder of Nightcrawler view, far away down the street, a line of police blue, red and white lights are flashing as the siren sounds.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, ROAD — NIGHT

Down the street from the building, a suped-up metallic blue street racer car with a giant red & orange phoenix bird painted over the bodywork speeds past CAMERA to outrun two police cruisers who follow past CAMERA behind.
The CAMERA views the speeding super car from the back left corner of the car as it speeds along the street.
Laying stomach flat on the boot of the car with his legs stretched out inside the car through the opening where the missing rear window glass would be is a masked criminal with a gun in each hand pointing at the pursuing police cruisers.
The laying gunman looks up and fires tens of bullets from his two pistols at the police cruisers’ windshield, tyres etc… The CAMERA views the police cruisers as they swerve to avoid the more precisely aimed shots. From a high up view the CAMERA follows the super-car as it speeds even faster and then drives OUT OF FRAME.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, ROOFTOP — NIGHT

From a high view the CAMERA sees the back of Night crawler standing on the rooftop edge watching as below and down the street the super-car approaches his position.
The CAMERA views the front of Nightcrawler, looking up from his feet up, from the side of the building as he stands on the edge of the rooftop.
In this hero stance chase/action music plays as Nightcrawler leaps off the building and drops down the side.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, BUILDING SIDE — NIGHT

With the chase/action music playing Nightcrawler falls freely alongside the building. The CAMERA views the end of his tail as it wraps around a horizontal pole from the building’s fire escape. From a full body view his body drops and swings below the horizontal pole to continue and swing his body off to his left.
In a wide variation of seamless flips, somersaults, tails swings, galloping and teleporting Nightcrawler moves along the building side on the framework of the fire escape to match the position and speed of the approaching super-car as the chase/action music plays.
Nightcrawler leaps up onto a walkway and gallops along as behind him on the road the super-car approaches a parallel position to Nightcrawler. Nightcrawler gallops and leaps forward toward a metal barrier, with his dark shadowy teleportation mist he disappears before hitting the barrier.
As Nightcrawler disappears the super-car speeds past below him on the road.

EXTERIOR NEW YORK CITY STREET, ROAD — NIGHT

With the chase/action music still playing, the super-car speeds along the street in slow motion as overhead a formation of dark shadowy teleportation accumulates and from out of the mist Nightcrawler appears and leaps forward aiming to land on the roof of the super-car.
Just inches before landing on the roof of the car the screen cuts to black and the designer credits roll to end the film as the music volume rises.

The above images are copyrighted to Marvel enterprises and Darick Robertson and Greg Land, and an unknown artist (not me).

Spider-Man Scene August 23, 2006

Posted by scartissuemark in Screenplay's, Stories, Scripts, Treatments....
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spider-man.png
Written by Mark Hawkins.

INTERIOR: New York City bus — driving.

Two men with bulky jackets get on and stand in the middle with the other passengers.
The two men each pull out a weapon. The first man pulls out handheld gun and the other pulls out a steel baseball bat.

GUNMAN (yelling)
Nobody move!

The gunman points the gun at all the passengers. His partner walks up to the driver.

MAN WITH BAT (yelling and instructing)
keep driving.

The gunman hands over his rucksack to the passengers.

GUNMAN (to the passengers)
Okay. Your wallets, jewellery and watches. Now.

EXTERIOR: City. Building tops.

Spider-man, the red and blue clad protector of New York swings on his web and drops onto the roof of the bus.

INTERIOR: City bus.

Everyone on the bus looks up as they here a thump from Spider-man’s landing.

EXTERIOR: City bus.

Spider-man crawls to a along the roof of the bus.

INTERIOR: City bus.

As everyone screams in terror the gunman starts shooting wildly up through the roof in an effort to hit the dashing wallcrawler.

EXTERIOR: Spider-man on the roof of the captive bus.

As the shots tear through the roof Spider-man rolls to the right side of the bus and rolls off and onto the right side of the bus.
As he sticks, with his hands and feet to the side of the bus, the gunman still doesn’t realise he has moved.

INTERIOR: City bus.

The gunman realises that his target has moved and is sticking to the side.

GUNMAN (angrily)
Hey!

He starts to move and shoots at Spider-man through the glass.

EXTERIOR: Right side of the bus.

Spider-man rolls along the bus so his back is facing the passenger then his front again when the gunman shoots at him. He punches through the non-broken glass and shoots web from his left hand that knocks the gun out of the crooks hand. Spider-man holds on with his hands and kicks off when the other crook with the bat swings through the glass. He swings his legs back down onto the panel below the glass.
The crook pushes his bat through the open hole as Spider-man kicks off again this time he rolls onto the roof of the bus and stands up.
On the roof Spider-man does a back flip, grabs the back of the bus and swings his body through the glass window at the back.
As he lands he shoots two web shots to knock the gun out of the first crooks hands. He then blocks the second crooks punch and punches him in the stomach and webs him to the wall.
Spider-man then webs the first crooks feet as he is running for the door and pulls him to the ground. He shoots a web-net onto the crook lying on the floor of the bus that traps him.

SPIDER-MAN (to the bus driver)
Stop the bus.

SPIDER-MAN (to the passengers)
You’re free to go.

Spider-man runs off the bus, leaps onto a car and shoots a web to swing away.

Escape From South Park (NY) July 3, 2006

Posted by scartissuemark in Composite Artwork, Screenplay's, Stories, Scripts, Treatments..., South Park-esque.
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Snake Plissken 'Arrested'The 4th Grade class stared to the doorway, a kid stood there, new to the class, but known far and wide, he was the youngest kid to be honoured by Trent Boyett for the most inflicted purple heart bruises in a inter-grade dodgeball war. He twisted a record 537 purple nurples to his enemies at Leningrad Elementary in North Park. ‘Dude that’s Nate Lissken’ said Stan, ‘Asshole, Nate Lissken’s Taller’ said Cartman. ‘Well gee wizz, who is this Lissken fella’ said Butters, He skipped out on his parents and Escaped from Cleveland, they didn’t find him for 2 years’ informed Kyle. ‘This is Nate’ said the teacher, ‘come tell us a little about yourself’ Nate drops his brown cigarette steps on it, looks ahead to his fellow kids and says ‘call me Lissken’.
Snake Plissken
On the street Jimmy Valmer approaches Nate. ‘Hello…Lissken’ he says, Nate stares back at him with a waiting look, ‘I heard you was a turr…a turrr-f… cust…omer and i was wer…werrr werrrndering if you ker…could help me…verry much’…’the…sss…sss…the sssixth graders toook Timmy‘s sh…sherrrr…shoes’. ‘Who’s Timmy’ Nate says. ‘…th-there he is’. Jimmy nod to across the street where Timmy is driving along in his wheelchair, he turns his head and looks back across the street, ‘Jimmaaaah, Timmaaaah’ Timmy says as he waves with his free hand. ‘Hi-tim tim’ jimmy responds. Nate looks back to Jimmy ‘What dy’a want from me’ Nate says. ‘werrrrrll you get them ba…baah..ck, i’ll give you t-ten dollars’.
Snake Plissken
His Mission has begun. Nate walks down 3rd/8th street in old south park. He carries with him his kidney juice in a super soaker, ready to defend against any 6th grader attack. Out of the shadows a spiky-haired kid appears, he whistles, and is then flanked by a gang. Nate pumps the weapon and shoots two at the approaching kids, he soaks another two and grabs the spiky haired leader. ‘where’s you boss!’ he says, ‘Don’t hurt me Lissken… yeah i know who you are… i thought you were dead’. ‘Where!’ Nate yells, ‘clubhouse!, backyard, house 10 on 29th street’ the kid says. ‘don’t nurple me Lissken’ he pleads. ‘…call me Nate’ he retorts, he then releases the kid.
Snake Plissken Ring Battle
At the house on 29th street, Nate stands below the tree clubhouse and grabs a baseball bat and a trashcan lid, he takes off his shirt and bangs the lid with the bat. Three members of the 6th graders look out and see him, ‘i’m coming up for the kids shoes’ Nate says. He begins climbing the ladder, a moment later a water balloon is dropped and he uses the lid as a should to protect himself from the red paint inside. He reaches the clubhouse and swings the bat bursting their supply of paint-balloons. He drops the armour and tittytwists two of the gangs subordinates, they cry holding their chests on the floor as Nate approaches the leader. ‘here, take’em, just get outta here’. Outside the clubhouse a wail of ‘ouch!’ is heard from inside and Nate appears and climbs down the ladder with Timmy’s shoes and the bat.
Snake Plissken Ring Battle After
Nate is more than halfway back, he checks the time and see that he has only has ten more minutes to run a fifteen minute distance in order to get the shoes to Jimmy and Timmy before Timmy has to be home otherwise Nate won’t get his ten bucks. He starts running, his skin feels sticky from the paint splatters that hit him back at the clubhouse. Three minutes left as he rounds a corner…. Two to go… He lands on Timmy’s street… 58 seconds to go as he meets Jimmy and Timmy heading for Timmy’s house… He tosses the shoes onto Timmy’s lap. ‘Timmaaaah’ he says as he point to his shoes. ‘Thank you very muh…much… Liiiiis-ken. Here you gah…Go’ Jimmy says as he hands Nate the money. ‘Take this, if they bother Timmy again, use it!’ He hands Jimmy the bat. ‘Say would y-you like to com in and have sss…sssome Juice’. Nate responds ‘I’m too tired, maybe later’

 

 

The above character designs are partially my own (photoshop) and a website’s web app…

I would like to Thank the creative people at http://www.sp-studio.de/ for their great software which made these “Snake Plissken” characters possible.

“Them Eyes” a Sin City yarn by Mark Hawkins July 1, 2006

Posted by scartissuemark in Screenplay's, Stories, Scripts, Treatments..., SIN CITY.
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'Them Eyes' A Short Story by Mark Hawkins

“Sin City” is a trademark owned by Frank Miller