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Pondering the beauty of what Life holds September 7, 2006

Posted by scartissuemark in My Life.

Yesterday i went to Harefield hospital for my six-monthly Transplant assessment. I have been on the TX list for a double lung transplant since July 2005, since then i have had one false alarm and a false alarm phone call.

Over the past few weeks i have been indoors almost all of the time, i think it’s for this reason that my nervous demeanor for the appointment turned to a peaceful calm as soon as we hit the road in the ambulance transport. While driving up the high street i stared out of the window at all the people going about their lives, I don’t know if it was the ambulance, the sunshine or the music in my iPod, but looking at them just walking and talking made me see a real beauty to life that i’ve missed out on for a while. Once we hit the motorway i was blissfully happy, this being an odd occurrence for me. We drove fast and i felt mesmerised by the whizzing lines of the tarmac surface of the road. The noise, or hum you might say, was refreshing and took me back to childhood memories of falling asleep in the back of my aunties car, hearing the tyres roll over the gravel roads of Limerich, Ireland. The scenery almost made me weep, the countryside, the green and yellow fields as far as i could see, the cattle, the farm buildings, it all illuminated what life offers. There was a large lake on the way and small neighbourhoods of old-fashion cobblestoned, cream painted houses and pubs with ponds in the rear with walkway bridges. At the hospital after the boring tests i ate lunch on a bench staring out at the field behind the hospital. It was all so relaxing and calming.

I found myself thinking to my contentuous dreamlife… Back in Ireland, in a house like my granddads (only a little more modern), gravel roads, open spaces of lush land, where you can hear visitors minutes away. A garage holding a ’66 Chevrolet Corvette in white with a red leather interior and a black sleek Suzuki motorcycle. A sofa in the field behind the house. A cabin with a desk so i can be inspired as i write. A beautiful, loving wife and baby daughter to share it all with.

That’s my dream

As for the rest of my TX assesment, my tests and stats have remained very solid and all is well unitl i get the call or…



1. johanna - September 9, 2006

this just totally made me cry a wee bit. beautiful!

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